Saturday, May 29, 2010

hanky-love-love-love

Well..this post is dedicated to you my dear...

+im just an ordinary girl and this isnt my imagination...this is for-real...


now..hm..im stuck alone in this pinkish-candly flossy room and reminsced the thing that had happened to me for past few days...

hehe....


it's started when he send me to the airport...(dipisah lautan biru)...you know it right..

and i just smile...we went to the airport..and my feeling???omg..bercampur2..im happy...nak jumpa my family but at the same time...faham-faham la...org yg xpaham ni maybe gay or lesbian..


and..allan,kyry,dzul,and ilanggo balik sekali ngan aku..so..we talked for hours....

and then....diaorg ajak aku masuk departure hall..omg..omg..chill aina..chill...


i looked at him and said bubbye...tetiba..k.fine..that's so weird...mata aku..omg...watery...it's not like im gone forever.but then..i cried..and all of them..mmg agak tekeejut...he just smile..maintain..but deep down inside i know him well....and slowly..dia anta aku depan gate...and..




..last word...take care....

suddenly..he gave me...



HIS WHITE HANKY WRAPPED WITH HIS BOW-TIE....and it was so adorable...he said..masuk dalam nanti..buka hanky ni....and i just straight-away line up at the immigration counter....bila sampai turn aku...


aku toleh..he was still there...muka dia dah lain...kind of...emo..and he said..dont cry(i can read it from hi body language..and i just nod)...smpai turn aku..


tiba-tiba my heart asked me to do this kind of crazy job..which was..i ran to him and grabbed his hand..salam again and ran back to the immigration counter... idont even know sapa yg tgk..tp who cares.....and here it goes..we were separated with the border line...and tears streamed down to my face....


aku masuk gate with the others...and i openned the wrapped hanky..and here it goes...



he wrote so many things there..omg...god created him that way..he was so romantic..and again...tears rolled down again-and again..(lawak..mcm movie)...



dear..thanks for the hanky..i do appriciate it <3 ya

Sunday, May 23, 2010

random facts that i might despice yet i love...

~occay..3 days to go and bubbye.
~feeling??
perhaps im feelingless and maybe suffocated a lil bit..but no worries there still lots of trees there
~got my marks already and how im going to tell my mom?haha..lawak
~craving for homemade food
~now?feels like crying..reason?i dont even know..
~im not in a mood...because of some reasons..yeah..
~another random fact..im going to miss Sabah.....i mean..erm..yea.....yet i miss my hometown....the place where i belong..for some reasons...
~despice of what?
+nothing actually.
-maybe i hate the emptiness...i mean it...lolx.
+positive....wuu...
_i hate this..when i give my everytihng and things goes the other way around..what the heck....i mean it...my stuff your stuff..your stuff????your stuff also..
ok fine....thanks for the new regulations..i do love it and someday im going to apply it..
~give and take..that's my policy and somehow rather be i think im not being appriciated for that....taking things for granted..ok...thank you for that..
~i thing this would be my first post about thing that i despice and i couldnt take the burden alone...blame it on me?come on...hit me...apa lagi????scream at me..rebel..come....
~just so you know..im the type yg menerima smua.by that..dont bully me..what the heck...dont be selfish..yea..you are so sibuk ..i can accept it...but y then you have to act as if im the stray dog..fyi..i rather died alone than being hurtedlike that...


nak marah cause i wrote this..be my guess......kick my ass and u wont see me again..
believe me...
+once smitten,twice shy+
till then....

me...

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

There's nothing that i want to say act.i mean im blank..and frankly said..im tired maybe..tired with bundle of ass..sigh....mean..that been dumped towards us.undeniable we shoul do it..but i dont feel like doing it..full stop....

it's getting bored..boredom is killing me..and perhaps one day...i might die because of being bored...

bored of what??
seriously..despicing of being a teacher...and i hate it..i mean it...huhh....
seriously.....i thought that maybe im going to fall in love with this career..but then i hate of making this stupid mistakes....im going to rebel..i mean it....

i hate this surrounding,and it's not like im being ungrateful or what..but still i felt stupid for not following my intuition for long2 time ago....following parents heart was a good deed and i never blame them..but then...i hate this kinda of situation where's all i can say that..this isnt my soul..and i feel rejected here.....and i hate it...i miss my old friends.tp not all la...yg still loyal..
thanks i love you all..and the backstabber...ni..seriously.blah la...mcm baik..yea..i know..


everyone's changing.so do i....but..seriously..this is me..and guys..you have to accept me for who i am..and top the madness..please...ya..i know..thanks.god...you all been sent to peninsular varsity...and you guys are so pious there...tp please..jgn slender aku...


to my ex-good friend..thanks la ngaku aku bestfriend....tp blakng...hmm...god knows....you know who you are..i respect u as my bestiest...guy friend..but then..now..i hate you.....tak payah la nak buat geng and say bad stuff boud me....thanks...engineer....kan dah kua....dulu yea..we share our madness together....soar..tp now..smua berubah...and yeah..you are cool..study luar...
tp please...jgn bajet pndai..as FAR AS I CONCERN..KAU DULU TU..just a noob guy yg xda kawan..but now..fuh...banyak pulak songeh kaw!!!


jgn cakap pandai ya syg...we all human being..and frankly im not perfect..sO do u..so please diam or else..kaw tau kan aku mcm mana..KAKI naik muka.....jgn cabar aku..aku diam sebab aku respect kau..tp jgn buat kepala...


FYI-girl benci laki mulut banyak.....diam luar..tp dalam facebook..berabih kau cakap..politik la..apa.la...adui....makin nyampah aku tgk kau...

Monday, April 26, 2010

~jibet~now i hate you thank you...

can i describe you right now?
stupid
selfish
moron.
again selfish
bajet....

serious cakap..i dont even need u as my friend..cibai you.......
aku dah xpdulik..gasak ng la..buat muka cm cibai....

aku diam ja slama ni..kira dah abih jatuh dah ego..ngan org len ko kalut nak berbaik..ngan kwan2 ko yg jaga ko dulu??cibai o..lantak la...malas..jnis x kng budi..mak bapak x ajar kot...

aku diam ni..bukan makna aku sabaq..tp malas dah..dah jadi malas..fed up......sangat2..blah la

Thursday, April 1, 2010

p/s i love you...

gazed at the phone screen,
there was one missed call,
it was him..
a guy that she didnt expect to fall.

it was holiday,
and she had her own way,
while he was playing,
she kept on praying...


days after days,
time passed by,
magic words that been said,
had turned to lie and cry...


they broke up,
and she's giving up..
the unspoken words then come and bloom,
stars shine the night and no more gloom..


they met up at the place called bay,
she stares at her and he begin to say,
dear,i love you stay with me,
as she nodded down with the blemish cheek.


i love you too,then she breaks the silent,
as night begin to crawl,
she feels the warmth in his cuddle
and they did solve the love puzzle...



p/s i love you....

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Life is like shit sometimes...

haha..There is no specific reason of why im doing this stupid blog...
in a stupid mode or hectic mayb?

some people said that life is like dick...whatever..i prefer shit..
both of them are mostly same...
and same..same..same(repitition)...

hurgh..im tired...tired of this fucking shit...haha...
kasarnya...apa2 jela...this is my blog...so what...
got problemo?


this post has nothing to do with anyone and i mean it..im tired..that's all..and there is no specific reason of why suddenly im tired with my so-called-happy life...


whatever..being born as a normal girl made me feel so free..free to soar.emancipate my feelings due to the darkness that shades my heart..i mean it....i miss my home..



there's no other place like home.....home




okay..done....


it's not like being ungrateful or what..or it's just my feeling..

pms?no....


apa2 jela...



i just wanna say that im tired..i need my sleep...i need a rest....

jealousy?hate to admit that...

but that's the one...


and im learning......




p/s=girls.......it is good to be independent as it wasnt good to trouble others life=))...




till then....

Saturday, March 27, 2010

just a girl

well..there's no other place like home...

and till now..i do believe in that....im just a girl.a normal girl..that seek for happiness..nothing much..i ask for nothing..gosh..expect for the happiness that im craving for..

well..im sorry(to anyone)..if this post will hurt some of you...or you..or you...
but then..this is the right place for me..pour all my problems,paint my sadness and draft my happiness..

but then..im just a normal girl-crash...*here comes my twenty-third times tears*

need someone to lay on right now...and hmm..yea..

again.....have fun k.


this post my be the annoying one.but..this is my emancipation..back off..
i have the write to speak.to soar.to talk...



and now..again..im emoing...


i need you right now...can't you just see it.=((

yeah..i tried to be cool..but it doesnt work..and jealousy is killin me..


here it goes.my instinct is there...(yea)..




cool.cool.cool..darn it..im not that cool....gosh..y it has to be this way...

-faithful
-devoted



but then..i will pray for the best..and my still...i hope you're going to keep on your words.cause..if you dont..this heart-will be-broken for the second time...